Saying Goodbye to the Boy Who Shaped My Mama Heart

This month I wanted to focus on all things Mama related with it being the month where we celebrate Mother’s Day. I am going to introduce some new mamas, as well as bring back some past guest contributors, to highlight mothers from many different walks of life.

The first mother I would like to bring back is my cousin and friend Leigh. Her past post- Jonah’s Story: Our 14 Year Infertility Journey, told the story of Leigh and her husband Jack’s long struggle with infertility. Please go back and check out that post if you missed it, or just reread it because it is so inspiring!

Today, Leigh is sharing a story very dear to her heart about her work as a caseworker in the foster care system. She was 23 years old when she was introduced to a little boy named Jeremey, and he forever shaped her heart as a mama! Please join me in welcoming Leigh to my Acreage of Grace!

Today is May 3rd. The birthday of a boy, who is now a grown man, I don’t know. Twenty years ago, he was just another kid on my foster care caseload, until that moment when I fell in love with him and wanted to bring him home to parent. My husband and I were new in our professions and had no children of our own yet. I got to know Jeremey more and more over the years. He was on my case load and I watched and managed as he didn’t seem to be a fit in any of the homes he was placed in for adoption consideration. I grew to understand that he needed to be the youngest child in the home to grow and thrive and that he needed mature and established parents with a relationship that could endure the trials and tribulations of raising a child with a broken heart.

With those things in mind, I knew it wasn’t best for Jeremey to be our son because we were young, recently married and wanting to have biological children soon. Luckily, he found a home that fit his needs and knowing this was his big chance, I said goodbye, knowing that any glimpse of me still involved might encourage him to disrupt the placement. That was one of the hardest things I have ever done. To this day, (especially given the fact that our biological child didn’t arrive until twelve years later after our 14 year infertility journey) I have some regrets.

Wherever you are today Jeremey, I hope you are happy and strong! Thank you for teaching me about what a child really needs, consistency, compassion and a parent who will put a child before themselves and that he or she doesn’t have to be biological to feel like your own. I hope that my own son has benefited from what Jeremey taught me 20 years ago. Happy Birthday my dear one, and Happy Mother’s Day to the mother who got to parent you! Thank you!

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